College White Russian

This recipe was actually shared from one of my fans- Steve. The College White Russian is the definition of desperation with a hint of aspiration.


The Shopping List:

1 Pint of Chocolate Milk… $2.01

1 Fifth of Bartons Vodka… $5.07 (absolutely disgusting)

Great Value Coffe Grounds.. $5.00


Grand total:… $12.08

The Mix:

Start out with a cocktail glass and drop three ice cubes in that puppy.

Dump one part coffee into the glass. (French Press Preferred)

Pour in roughly two parts vodka, three parts if you had a rough week.

Drizzle the delicious chocolate milk on top of the icy vodka.

Ladies and gentlemen: The College White Russian.

A White Russian typically is a cocktail made with vodka, coffee liqueur (e.g., Kahlúa or Tia Maria), and cream served with ice in an Old Fashioned glass. Often milk will be used as an alternative to cream.

That is far too elegant for a college student, and one of my favorite beverages is chocolate milk. So why not throw in some vodka and make it tangy?

The Verdict:

I gotta say, as awful as the concoction sounds it doesn’t taste terrible. While you should definitely use higher quality vodka than I did (the equivalent of gasoline) the chocolate milk balances out the kick of the liquor. This bad boy is sure to make your head hurt in the morning, ringing in at a 4/5 on the hangover scale. But one benefit of the drink is getting calcium while getting drunk, what could be better! If you are feeling desperate and school is getting ya down, pound a few College White Russians to pick yourself back up.

–As always, drink responsibly.

Jay’s Shipwreck

ARG!!!! Whenever I drink rum, I feel like a pirate. I have this odd urge to go around plundering villages and set sail across the vast blue sea. So in due respect of piracy, I decided to make my adaption of a Shipwreck.

The Shopping List:

 1.75 L of Admiral Nelson…$14.95

1 L of Country Time Strawberry Lemonade…$3.00

Variety pack of Fruit Barrels…$4.00

Leftover Orange Juice…priceless.

Grand Total: $21.95

A little more pricey than some of my other drinks, but I promise the taste is worth it. You’ll find yourself being castaway in the deliciousness.

The Mix:

3 Ice Cubes

3 Parts Admiral

2 Parts Strawberry Lemonade

1 Part Orange Juice

1 Part Lime Barrel

A normal Shipwreck consists of spiced rum, cranberry juice, orange juice and pineapple juice. I did not have several of the ingredients so I improvised and it tastes better than I expected.

The Verdict:

My Shipwreck is sure to be a hit; after a few of these bad boys you’ll be sinking. The strawberry lemonade works with the orange juice and spiced rum to simulate a sort of coconuty-pina colada flavor. Everything blends well and there is nothing stronger than another flavor. On the hangover scale, I’d say a 3.5/5. Dark liquors are always sure to cause headache the next day and this has no exception. Set sails ye scurvy dogs.

Big Ol Mimosa-The Hangover Cure

Waking up with the pain from last nights party is never fun. I want to help ease your pain, so I present to you: JAYS INFAMOUS BIG OL MIMOSA


The Shopping List:

One bottle of Andre champaign…$5.07

One 4-pack of Miller Lite…$2.94

One gallon of Orange juice…$3.50

Grand Total: $11.51 (I might have lied in the video and said it was under $10, I apologize I’m a human)

You don’t necessarily need a gallon of orange juice, a carton will suffice but it all depends on how much you really want to make.

The Mix:

Start with the bubbly; mixing this first is crucial to the overall taste. Adding it on last won’t allow for as much aeration. So pour about 2-3 parts of champaign in your glass.

Next, add roughly half a can of the beer of your choice. I used Miller Lite because Wisconsin.

Finally, top off our concoction with the nutritious orange juice. Around 4 parts should do the trick.


A typical mimosa uses either beer or champaign, I use both. Thats the real secret, blending the two together really adds a punch to the mix. The champaign tends to be a little too dry for my liking so adding beer evens it out a bit.


The Verdict:

This is hands down my favorite hangover remedy. On the hangover scale it scores a 1/5 because it is intended to fix a hangover, not create one. In flavor land this mimosa would be the mayor. My God is it delectable, the bubbles of champaign works against the beer and the orange juice mediates the two nicely. If you need your hangover fixed, this is Doctor Jordan P.h.d’s prescription.

Four Lokorita

Nothing says relaxation like a margarita made with a four loko! This week teased us with gorgeous weather, and spring break is just on the horizon. I was really craving a tropical drink I could guzzle down while imagining I was on a beach somewhere and not stressing about classes.

The Shopping List:

Any good margarita has three main parts: the tequila, the ice and the fruit. This drink substitutes tequila for a extremely caffeinated, sugary four loko.

1 Cup of crushed ice…

One 16 oz bag of frozen mixed berries…$2.99

One Four Loko (flavor of your choice, I prefer green apple)…$2-3.00

And if you’re craving a little stronger drink, a splash of Caliber vodka ($7.99 for 1.75 Liters) will strengthen the marg nicely.

Grand total: $5.99 

Or the adult margita for $12.99

Especially due to recent events causing an import tax from Mexico to increase, margaritas tend to be a bit pricy. This delicious alternative adds a zesty twist, blending the over-sweetened four loko with fruit and watering it down with crushed ice. I am personally not a big fan of the Four Loko, it has such a distinctly gross flavor to it and the sugar in one can is absurd. But when combined with some blended fruit and ice, it deludes and the additions really accent the drink.

The Mix:

It is preferable to use a larger glass, the more volume provided the better.

One cup of crushed ice

Two cups of frozen mixed berries blended

Three parts Four Loko

If you’re really feeling loco, dip the rim of the glass in sugar prior to mixing.

The Verdict:

The Four Lokorita is the first taste of spring, and an affordable one at that. Four Lokos are a little sneaky and you need to be careful when enjoying one responsibly. On the hangover scale I would give the lokorita a solid 3/5, definitely drink a few glasses of water with this one.

The flavor is admirable and a definite improvement from the original Four Loko. For roughly $6 it is an outstanding margarita and while its not the same as a tequila filled smoothie, its a cheap and acceptable substitute. Back when I came up with this idea during my sophomore year I was instantly hooked on them. I sip on one on occasion now, and they are always go down great when the sun is shining.