My mom is one of the smartest people I know. Its true, she’s not exactly a chess grandmaster, but she DOES know a lot about life, love, and happiness. Over the years she has taken great pains to pass her wisdom to me, and today I would like to share one of her greatest lessons with you.

I was real crabby one morning. Yup. Thats how it started. I don’t remember why I was upset, but in the moment that something was more than enough to put me in a foul mood. Furthermore, I had been taking my anger out on my mom by being particularly prickly. Which is terrible. Because my mom is awesome.

After about 20 minutes of putting up with my Debbie Downer attitude, my mom eventually snapped. She stopped the car, threw it in park, looked me dead in the eye, and said:

“John. Name 10 things that your thankful for right now.”

Somewhat taken aback by the red in her voice, I stumbled for something witty to say.

“Well?”, my mom said incredulously.

My sarcasm had fled me. My normal whit had withered under the glare only moms can summon. I decided to just try to answer the question. Mom was obviously a little peeved, and nobody likes an angry mom. Best to just defer the anger at this point. So I decided to start at the beginning of the day and hope I stumbled across some things to be thankful for:

“Well I woke up this morning, and . . . “

Mom stopped me.

“Some people didn’t wake up this morning.”

She put the car in gear and merged back onto the highway.

I didn’t say a word.

 

I know this sounds like a “it could be worse” type scenario, but I don’t think that “it could be worse” was the message my mom was trying to convey. I think she was trying to remind me that the very breath in my lungs was a good enough reason to be in a good mood no matter what happened that day.

The fact that I woke up that morning was worth a smile.

The fact that I sat up in bed was cause for a happy dance.

The fact that I had food for breakfast was a solid incentive to boldly sing in the shower.

We often talk about happiness like its a side effect and contingent on something else. “If I can get an A in this class I’ll be happy”, or “I’d be happy to just HAVE a car”. We say it like we NEED something to be happy. But you don’t need anything to be happy. Happiness is something you can DO all by yourself.

 

So how does one DO happy?

Here the 4 tricks I use when I do happy, I hope they work for you too!

1. Don’t let your wounds fester.

I don’t even recall what happened that made me so mad in the story above. That’s how insignificant it was. My entire day was being ruined by it, though, because I didn’t force myself to move on. If you keep thinking about the bad things that have happened, you will begin ignoring the good things. So don’t let it get ya down, and you’ll see the good things that happen too!

A good trick for staying on top of this one is to pair bad events with good ones. Never rant about ONLY the bad things that happened to you that day. Instead, rant for a good while (because it’s good for the soul), and then tell a story about how you laughed at the long-boarder who ate it this morning. Use the funny stories to keep an even keel.

 

2. Assume things will go wrong, and become okay with the idea.

I know this one’s a little strange, but seriously. If you expect everything to go how you planned it to, you will be disappointed. Like a lot. Luckily, things going haywire can be one of the best parts about life! How dull would life be if we could predict it? #gross

 

3. Laugh at yourself. Often.

I started laughing at myself one day, and I haven’t regretted it yet. Being able to laugh at your own errors or stupidity is a spice of life. Think of it this way: you are aware of 100% of the dumb things you say, think, and do. Not laughing at them would be a waste! Also, you can’t offend yourself by laughing at yourself. =P

 

4. Fall in love with the fact that you’re breathing.

Like in the story above, there are a million good things that happen to you every day. DON’T FORGET ABOUT THEM.

 

 

I can’t express enough how big of a difference these tips have made in my life. Deciding to do happiness was a pivotal moment for me, and I hope these tricks will help you do happiness in the future!

 

P.S. – Comment if any of these tips helped you at all! I’m sure my mom would be thrilled to hear her smarts are appreciated! If you have any tricks of your own feel free to share too!