Our Cat Overlords
By Hunter Wade | February 9, 2023
“Cats rule the world.” – Jim Davis.
The Egyptian sphinx has the body of a lion, and the head of a human. A wonderful creation, showing that the earliest humans found the cat, god-like. When looking at any ecosystem, cats through evolution remain on top from the lion of the safari, tigers in the jungle, jaguars, and saber tooth tigers of the past. Do house cats dominate the household?
I share a house with 8 people, we call it the ranch, don’t tell my landlord, one couple at the house have two cats: Peaches, and Chester. Chester is a young orange and white cat, still a kitten with a loud and energetic personality. He stretches among the couch by the main door, waiting for human passers to give him attention. Peaches on the other hand, a few years older, prefer quiet rooms and unlike chaster a smaller audience. She doesn’t shy away from pets, she will trench her body on the ground and roll around. Most cats I have come across with, are either loud and playful like Chester, or individual and quiet like Peaches.
Cats are known to hypnotize their prey, including birds, mice, and … humans through a microscopic parasite, called toxoplasmosis. Think of the endless tropes of the crazy cat lady. Is this why the Egyptians worshiped them as god, and the pilgrims associated them with witches and the devil?
This brings me to “the Great Cat Massacre” by Robert Darton. A story of early modern France, that symbolizes inequality between masters and servants. If you ain’t familiar with the story, here’s a quick run down:
Workers of a printing press grew to hate their master and wifes cats. While they worked relentless hours in the cold, and served scarps. The cats enjoyed comfort from their masters, fresh food, and protection from their masters. In a funny episode, a few workers climbed the roofs of the press owners, and howled like cats. This upset the master’s wife, and influenced the owner into ordering the workers to round up all the cats. In a form of early workers’ protest, the workers held a trial where they beat, and killed the cats.
This Christmas, another couple got two more cats: Blicky, and Jaba (both star wars nerds). These brothers were kept in their master’s room, and weren’t allowed to communicate with Peaches and Chester until they were house broken. They were both reluctant to have the two cat pairs meet, they wanted all the cat love to themselves. Finally the cats met, and some drama played out. Peaches paid little attention to them, giving off a few hisses. On the other hand, Chester chose violence. Choosing to “play” and dominate Blicky and Jabas cat tower. Chester was removed from the room, and a certain ceasefire lasted a few days, until yesterday. Last night, the cats were found chasing each other, and Jaba who shares characteristics of Chester was asleep peacefully on Chester and Peaches cat tower. The bullying of Chester, and avoidance of Peaches ended.
Horny cat, is a white, black, and brown stray cat that has been seen around the ranch for years. Usually coming over in heat, looking for the other cats to play with. My girlfriend and I are now in the process of adopting the cat. She brought tuna today, and we read the wikihow on how to deal with stray cats. It feels like real-life pokemon, in which we must earn trust then trap and de-animalise the cat for home life. We must cat-proof the house, provide food, water, and a litter box, and rip up my college bank account. I guess it’s time to cut back on ramen.
I remember the early internet boom of the 2000s, and its obsession with cat memes. Viewing cat media is supposed to bring positive emotions, (Why Cats Rule the Internet (treehugger.com). It seems that throughout human history, cats have left their paw-mark.
Lastly, I want to end on a high school history teacher antidote: would we have bombed Hiroshima if they were only cats? No, not the innocent and loving cats. Do we project human traits on these little pestors? Why do we love cats, but choose to neglect people?
Anyway my clothes smell like cat piss, I blame my roommates.
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Rugby Letter to Bill Burr
By Hunter Wade | January 31, 2023
I am an active listener of Bill Burrs podcast, and on a previous episode invited listeners to write in about rugby.
I have been a fan of your podcast and comedy for years. My girlfriend and I love listening to your podcast together. I was inspired by last week’s episode to write in. I am part of the 3% that gives a flip about rugby. I grew up loving the sport because my Dad coached me in high school. I still play today in college for the University of Wisconsin – Whitewater and am ambitious to play in Denver, the rugby capital of the US, this summer.
The sport isn’t as popular here in America as you pointed out, but it is the 2nd most popular sport worldwide behind soccer. Did you know that football gets the word “touchdown” from a rule in rugby where you must touch the ball down in the endzone? As a fan, I think it’s a shame that it’s not as popular in the states. For one, it is safer than American football; there are less concussions and head injuries. In football, the helmet and padding are used as weapons for players to throw themselves into one another. Without protective equipment, rugby players have to be strategic about the situations they put themselves in and how they go down. While rugby has the brutality of football, it does not have the same threat of CTE. It’s a game with few time-outs and even during injuries there is continued play. Another difference between rugby and football is trash talking to the referee. While this is all too prevalent in football, it is not tolerated in rugby and will lead to a yellow card, and a trip to the sin bin. However, the most amusing difference is the appearance of the fans and players. Rugby fans will wear crazy costumes like it’s Halloween and players rock mullets like it’s the 1980’s.
You also commented on how hard it is to find rugby to watch. With the Peacock app, you can catch the rugby 7s World Cup on tv this Saturday. It’s a tournament played in quick 15-minute games, with over 30 countries playing, for 10 hours of exciting rugby content. I would encourage you to watch, as The United States has one of the GOATs of 7s players, Perry Baker, who is actually an ex-NFL player. To get you excited about rugby, check out this highlight reel of Argentina making a comeback from their game against Canada.
Finally, the last aspect about rugby that I enjoy is the camaraderie. Hosting teams will have an after-match in which both teams will drink together and sing songs (usually funny, dirty, rugby songs). There is also such a thing as whoring in rugby and it’s when you show up to a game or tournament and play with any team that needs players. It’s a cool way to connect with people from all over. Unlike football, which has an age limit, rugby has tons of different leagues. Some of which are for only older gentlemen, and some are entirely social leagues where drinking is encouraged. Anyone can find a league that matches their lifestyle. Hope you found this informative and enticing.
Keep up the laughs and stories Burr.
Go Ruck yourself,
Hunter
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My Glorious Echo Chamber
By Hunter Wade | January 30, 2023
“Good news is rare these days, and every glittering ounce of it should be cherished and hoarded and worshiped and fondled like a priceless diamond.“
-Hunter Thompson
Every morning as I step onto the exercise bike, I scroll through morning brew. I like its simple, organized, and short news format to catch the headlines of the day and to see if any stories catch my interest. Once I return home from the weight room, I throw on a podcast either BBC Sounds or Democracy Now! as I make breakfast.
Both shows are very liberal of course but also very entertaining as they focus on 2 or 3 stories, and have guests and experts familiar with the topic. Once breakfast is ready, I sit down and open up youtube on the boob tube, and float to either Channel 5 news or Phillop DeFranco.
I implore you to check out Channel 5 , journalist Andrew Callaghan will go to Trump rallies, Biker rallies, and flat earth conventions and let the people who love the camera’s attention make a fool of themselves. It’s great journalism, because it lets the viewer draw his own conclusions, and doesn’t feel like it has an agenda. Hunter Thompson, the gonzo journalist, would be proud.
On Mondays, I’ll watch LastWeekTonight with John Oliver on HBO, who is very funny and smart, almost always focusing on one story and always ending the story with a call to action or a positive spin on what the viewer can do to help.
Unlike my zoomers friends, I have fled Instagram, snapchat, twitter, and god awful Facebook. Instead I try to read longer articles online and avoid the short bursts of entertainment all too prevalent on social media. A website with links to long and abundant articles is Arts & Letters Daily (updated daily 🙂 ).
The app Raindrop.io keeps all my bookmarks organized, and categorized (unfortunately this blog isn’t sponsored by raindrop).
Besides grinding the stone of homework or forwarding my neglected writing project of rewriting the Great Gatsby (started last year on chapter 3), I find myself hooked to Ian Shaprio. No, not Ben Shaprio (guy is utter trash), Ian is a professor from Yale who focuses on Power and Politics in Today’s World. He uploaded a semester of his class and out of 20 lessons, an hour long, I’m on 12.
Am I living in an echo chamber of my own world views, and every day like smelling my own farts, I find pleasure in being rewarded by hearing my own beliefs being reestablished? Well maybe, BUT by avoiding social media at all costs, like a pirate avoiding the plank, I want to cast a wide net on the internet (no pun intended).
We live in an era of watching the public turn against the news, for they do lie and push their own agenda, they want your money for ads and you to stay angry for repeated viewership. But we have the internet now, and if you are just staying in your echo chamber tribe (unfortunately like my fox conned parents). You are missing the true glory of the internet: the wide range of opinions and information.
PS: The Onion (For opening my younger eyes to news and politics)
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“Sorry, we are Closed”
By Hunter Wade | January 26, 2023
The end of an era
2023 started with a bang. On Jan. 20, the free US cable streaming website USTVGO, giving viewers up to 300 channels, was terminated by the matrix. In one swift day, a website, twitter and discord disappeared, confirmed by torrentfreak (Popular TV Streaming Service USTVGO Shuts Down * TorrentFreak). A community of cord-cutting pirates are now cableless.
Youtube comments and online articles blame an article (journalists ruining the fun for everyone) and a growing discord server that may have put this underground website on some anti-piracy tv executive’s radar.
I watched the 2020 debates, caught late night adult swim, and endless hours of south park, all on this streaming website. While some pirates enjoy watching stream sites with zero ads check out lookmovie2 for free shows and just movies. Others, like me, enjoyed joining the cable matrix, with everyone’s favorite mind numbing fun: commercials.
While some might gawk and mouth vomit at the idea of people watching cable for free. There will always be other websites to fill the void, but we have yet to see if a website can pick up as much steam and popularity as USTVGO.
As we march closer to a more centralized internet, a certain freedom of going against the grain and allowing those without the financial means to enter the wild western media circus has unfortunately ended.
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Wades Book review: 1776
By Hunter Wade | January 25, 2023
A man among men.
If you google any list of the most influential Americans: George Washington appears. A name every baby born in America ought to know. And why do we worship such a rich, slave-owner? It’s dangerous to idolized one man, for one man doesn’t turn the wheels of history, but George Washington comes damn close.
When I reflect on important American historical figures, I think of Malcom X, who denounced the civil rights movement for being too white, and John F. Kennedy, who spoke of a peaceful world and who may have died at the hands of the US government, and Eugene Debs who spoke for the working class and those in prison. What does all these men have in common with George Washington? An appetite for greatness.
In an age of isolation, polarization, and anxiety. We need better role models. Andrew Tate, Elon Musk, and Donald Trump won’t save you.
1776 by David Burke portrays Washington as a True American Hero.
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