This article discusses the relationship between two young individuals whose relationship began online in a chatroom. Told through the perspective of the father of the son, we learn about 15-year-old Henry and his journey from Cambridge to Omaha to meet his girlfriend, Sarah, face-to-face for the first time. As with most discussions of online dating, the author takes a stance on weather or not they approve of online dating. Henry’s father was very supportive of his son’s efforts to get to know Sarah and gives the reader insight as to how the couple stayed close despite the distance. As the third paragraph in the article states, “They sent each other virtual candy, flowers, and cards downloaded off various Web sites. They spoke of “going out,” even though they sat thousands of miles apart.” They also sent each other packages through the mail. Upon their meeting in real life, they discussed mainly the chatroom, sports, and videogames. Unfortunately, as most relationships do between young teenagers, their relationship fizzled out as time passed. Even though the author of this story claims that they reason they broke up was not because they met online, I would have to partially disagree. Obviously I do not know these people but I feel like in order for any relationship to be successful there must be some physical connection. The internet does help us a great deal in staying connected, but it is up to us and our ability to interact with people in real life to keep that relationship real.
While reading this article, I was very intrigued about two very young teenagers meeting online. While I am a firm believer that the internet does a wonderful job of connecting people through a virtual medium, there is still a part of me that believes two people need to be physically close to each other to achieve genuine human connection. However, I think the article brings up an interesting point that communicating through online conversations isn’t all that different from communicating through love letters, despite the fact that love letters are generally more accepted as a way of showing compassion than exchanging messages online. Even though in my opinion I feel like you should meet in person before you date, there have been many successful relationships that were formed online. It is so bizarre to believe that such a delicate and wonderful relationship could be formed having both the individuals sitting behind a screen.
The concept of “architecture of participation” is extremely relevant to online dating. When creating a profile for an online dating website, one is expected to build their profile as a representation of themselves and then participate in the act of judging weather or not others on the same dating platform would be compatible with them based on how they have built their profile.
As technology develops, online dating has evolved as well. While most people in society have met their significant others through school, clubs, etc. it is common for couples to meet online. Off the top of my head, I can think of quite a few people in my life who have met their significant others online. Sometimes I will hear my friends talk about “tinder boys” they find attractive and it becomes an entire conversation. This explains how these dating websites and apps have changed society’s rules about dating.
People are motivated to share certain information online because they want to make others fall in love with them. We know that others will be attracted to our successes, adventures, goals, etc. and try to downplay our fears, flaws, and insecurities, which are all the things that make us “real” people. As people become closer on a dating website they may feel more comfortable sharing this information, but there is a certain risk involved. You never know exactly who is on the other side of the screen. It could be somebody lying about who they are, or somebody who may not be as trustworthy as you originally thought. I think people take this risk because they think if it turns out well they will be happier because they have found somebody they can depend on.
This article teaches us how people can be brought together through online communication technologies and how it gives them a foundation to start a friendship, and even a relationship. As Henry and Sarah talked online, they learned things about each other that they could discuss face to face. So even though some may argue that online platforms do not provide much room for deep discussion, we can see how they play a crucial role for some.