Erica’s World

Dating brings a lot of tension but it is even more stressful when you are a single parent. Feelings of doubt, fear, and guilt are protocol. Timing and planning is essential for a successful entrance into the dating stratosphere. A single parent doesn’t have to choose parenting over dating or vice versa. There are a lot pressures that come with dating and parenting but it can be done. Figuring out how to approach dating and how to bring the subject of you dating to your children can be tricky. I have a few suggestions when you decide to take that giant leap into the strange and scarry world of dating.

Take Care Of Yourself
You can’t be the best parent to your child if your needs aren’t met. This includes dating. Every single parent needs a social life that doesn’t include dirty diapers and wiping up Cheerios. There is no shame if you decide to go on a date. You’ll be happier and your child will be happy if you are happy.

The Decision Is Up To You
Only you know when you are ready to start dating. Don’t let friends and family pressure you into starting something you aren’t ready for emotionally. Dating can be fun but nobody wants to be around someone who’s heart is not committed to all that dating brings.

Talk With Your Kids
Be honest. Let your children know what’s going on. Assure them that they aren’t being replaced. They’ll understand that you need time to yourself. Explain to your kids that you are going out with a friend. You don’t know where your date will lead to so they don’t need to know anymore at the present moment. When you know more, you’ll inform your children more. After all, you are looking for an adult companion to join you for an afternoon of golf, not a daddy for little Tommy.

Go Slowly
Take your time when introducing your children to your new boyfriend or girlfriend. It’s not appropriate to introduce your child to a date you aren’t serious with. He’s not only dating you, eventually, he’s dating your child too. Allowing herto get too close your boyfriend, only to to break up a few months later will leave your child hurt and confused.

Listen to Your Children
It may be a big red flag if your child doesn’t like who you are dating. However, use good judgement. If your child doesn’t want you to date period, you know you have to spend more time easing him into this new change in your life. If your child doesn’t like your new girlfriend because she makes him feel uncomfortable, pay attention. Watch more closely the interaction between your girlfriend and your child. If something doesn’t jive, you’ll know if you’ll need to let go of that relationship.

Be a Parent First
As a single parent, you come with certain, unchangeable priorities. Let your new boyfriend know at the beginning that your children come first. Honor your committments. If it’s your weekend with children, spend it with them. Your new boyfriend will understand. If he doesn’t, he’s not a man and certaintly not the man for you!

Go For It
What’s the worse thing that can happen? Okay, plenty. That’s true for anyone. However, you’ll never know what can happen if you never give it a try.

Other Sites To Consider

http://www.singleparentmeet.com
http://singleparentsmatcher.com
http://www.singleparentmatch.com
http://www.singleparentsmingle.com